#12 (the other man, and the first protective order).

# 12 (the other man, and the first protective order)

One of my new customers in my coffee shop would come in every single day and get his same latte, and then sit down with his laptop and stay for an hour or so. My coffee shop was an internet cafe (which back in the day was scarce) so he was coming in and using our internet. Wil would see him pull up in the parking lot and would start making his coffee for him, so that it was ready by the time he walked up to the counter. Wil was awesome at this. He recognized our customers pulling up and would have their coffee, exactly the way they wanted it, ready for them when they walked in. He is fabulous!

We will call this customer Michael. We got to know him well and every time he came in, I would make an effort to come chat to him. Over time Craig got to know him too and soon they were good buddies and playing racquetball in the mornings before coffee time. I was happy that Craig had made a friend that was not female.

Then one day Craig told me that Michael was coming over for dinner. When Michael arrived he had his swimsuit in his hands. Craig had told him we had a hot tub and to bring his suit.

While we were eating dinner something hit me. I realized this whole thing was a plan of Craig's. I took him to the bedroom and asked him what was going on. He said he had been “working” on Michael because he realized it was unfair that he was bringing a woman into our bedroom and that it was time for me to have 2 men. I nearly died. I told him absolutely not. I was NOT going there. As much as I liked Michael as a person, I was not interested in having a physical relationship with him at all. But once Craig had a flea in his ear, there was no going back.

After dinner the 3 of us got in the hot tub. I don’t know how to explain how impossible it was to say no to Craig. I am sure some of you are saying…..just say no. If I thought for a minute I could get away with it, I would have…..but by this point I was giving up. I was on autopilot and didn’t have any fight left in me. It was easier just to do what I was told, than to try and fight it.

These are very personal notes, and if they offend you then please skip the next paragraph. I am opening up and putting all my memories into words and keeping emotion out of it. This may sound emotionless…..but that is how my memories are saved. This whole blog has taken a very physical toll on my body and I have never been so sick in my life. The strep was just the start of constant physical ailments, but I’m told it’s my body purging. So I have to barge through.

Next thing Michael and I are in the shower, Craig is standing outside of the shower encouraging us to do what he wants to see through the glass doors. Michael was shaking like a leaf, and I must have looked like a statue. I certainly felt like one.

We went to bed and after a few hours Michael went home. Even he realized at that point, that he and I were puppets in Craig's game. The next day he told me he was very uncomfortable with what had taken place and that he never wanted to do that again. He also said that I needed to get out of that relationship as he saw signs of emotional abuse that really bothered him and he was concerned about what was going on in my home. I told him I felt trapped and didn’t know who Craig was anymore. Michael said he was scared for his own life, and more concerned for me. He told me I needed to make a plan to get out.

Michael would call to check on me everyday and knew that it was not safe to call me on my cell phone as Craig was keeping a close eye on every call I received or made. So he called me on my shop phone. Apparently Craig saw that coming, or figured it out, because one day while I was in my office I noticed a wire I had not seen before. I followed it and found it was connected to my phone and to a tape recorder.

I traced the wire and found the recorder. Craig had set it up to record all my conversations. Except this one backfired on him. When I played it back I discovered a conversation between Craig and Liz! He had called her from my office earlier that day, and either forgot he had set up this recorder (which I doubt)….or maybe he thought I would not find it. During this conversation she referred to me as “the gatekeeper” and the conversation was very sexy and sultry and it was very clear they had been seeing each other behind my back. I was shocked, but not really. I knew this all along, but this made it very real. So I called Craig and confronted him about the recorder. He said he “knew” Michael and I were cheating behind his back and he was going to prove it with that recorder. I told him about the conversation I had heard between him and Liz. What I didn’t realize is that while I was speaking to Craig (on his cell phone), he was driving over to the coffee shop. As soon as he realized what I had in my hands he jumped in his car and headed over to the shop. When he arrived he skidded the car right up by my office window. My instinct was to run. I grabbed the tape and ran out the back door. He chased after me around the back of the building and quickly caught up with me, slamming me up against the concrete wall. I was knocked out for a few seconds and when I came to, I was lying on the ground, bleeding from my mouth, and had a gash on my face from hitting the concrete wall. Craig was gone, and so was the tape. I walked back to my car but discovered Craig had taken it, along with the keys to his car. I couldn’t go back into my shop in that state, so I walked to the Kaysville police station which was about 3 blocks away. They took photographs and a report and they helped me file a protective order. This was the first of several. I knew that Craig was walking on thin ice with the INS. I knew that a protective order could get him deported and my boys would lose their dad. I knew all of this. But so did he. I couldn’t protect him anymore.

I didn’t want to go home. I checked myself into a hotel and called the boys and told them I wasn’t going to be home that night. They had no idea about what was going on and I didn’t want them to know.

That’s it for this episode. It has been harder than I expected to recall these memories, but one day at a time they will come out. There is still so much, I don’t think we are halfway yet.

Thanks again for following, until next time, Keep love in your heart!!